Every Once And A While...

by Mary Courtney Blake

... you realize that you are older than you thought you were.  Or, at least, that others are younger than you thought they were.

I have had several of these moments lately.  Little things like overhearing a hostess at the restaurant where you are eating talking about being assigned her college roommate when not 3 minutes before, you thought that she was in your age bracket... now you realized that you are nearly a decade her senior.  Or meeting some young up-and-coming in a suit and tie then finding out this is their first real job, and you think to yourself, "If you are 21, what do I look like to you?"  The list could go on and what I have realized is that I have absolutely no concept of how old I look or where I am in relation to someone else's life stage.

All of this is not written to sound depressing or to be some diatribe against aging.  I know that I am very much still young and inexperienced as some of you are probably thinking that I am crazy for realizing that I am older than some when I am still younger than so many.  What I am really getting at, however, is that this is one of the first times in my life when I have realized that I am all grown up.  It's an odd feeling when one first discovers it.  And, thinking about it, I would have thought that this realization would have come upon me much earlier in my life.  I have been out of my parent's home since I was 17, and though they supported me though college, it's been a few years more since then.  I have been a high school teacher, a professional designer, a starving artist and now a restaurant worker... and I am just now realizing that I am an adult.

In a lot of ways this makes me wonder about what I am doing with my life.  Shouldn't I have accomplished something a little more substantial by now?  I picked up a local arts magazine a couple of months ago only to realize that one of my former high school students was on the cover with her husband promoting their band (yes, that's right, I said husband).  I have written Air Force Academy recommendations for former students and bumped into others in social situations only to realize that they are catching up to me.  College friends are making families and settling down, while others are finding critical acclaim with their work.

I might have become overwhelmed by all of this, or maybe a little too introspective, if I had not also stumbled upon a young woman's list of dreams.  It was a picture essay of sorts, shared with myself and the world no doubt as some sort of youthful statement of identity and independence.  But, I found it to be lovely.  A young girl not unlike myself, yet so different....  She shared all of those dreams to come, things like places to visit, libraries to be gained, food to be made and love to be felt.  And, as I sifted through her visual study, I realized that I was looking at many of her aspirations from the other side.  I have visited that particular castle.  I can make that delicious treat.  My living room is filled with books in wrap around bookcases and the beautiful laughter of friends and family.  I can drive a stick shift.  I have learned not only to love but that love is a choice to give, not the annihilation of your loneliness... I have failed, I have succeeded, I have become.

I do not envy the youth of others.  Rather, I revel in the wisdom and understanding that experience and age have brought me.  There is joy in the thought of growing older, of continuing to become.  What a wonderful thought to know that when lines gather in the corners of my eyes, they are only the visual reminder of the smiles and laughter I have had, that the creases in my forehead will tell of the sorrows I have borne and overcome, and that the scars on my hands will recount the pies I have baked and the people I have fed.  But most of all, there is wonder at the thought of the joy in my heart that will share the peace that comes from living and learning.  If there is any moral to these ramblings at all, I suppose it is this:  Growing up is very hard, but it gets much easier with practice and for me becoming a grown up has been and continues to be well worth the effort.

Flatbread Pizza On The Fly.

(or Yummy Goodness that's Good for the Whole Family)

by Mary Courtney Blake

After last week's grocery adventures, I came home to find that, in my excitement, I had bought Naan twice, at two different stores.  This left me with the challenge to find interesting and yummy things to do with this Indian flatbread.  Mostly, I simply and deliciously ate it as a side with my meals as it is more or less intended to be eaten.  However, as I was sifting through the remnants of the week's food in the refrigerator, hungrily trying to find any ingredients that might make up a meal, I had a wonderful thought... Naan looks an awful lot like prepared pizza dough, except it is yummier and and much more nuanced.

So, I dug out all of those little bits of leftover veggies and random ingredients that were left over from an variety of other lunches and dinners.  Here is a list of the bits of things I found:

Almost Wilted Broccoli

Kalamata Olives

Red Onion

Capers

Goat Cheese

Garlic

Prosciutto 

and lastly Hollandaise Sauce (don't be intimidated... this is not a staple of my refrigerator and in this scenario, olive oil will do quite nicely)

Being that this little improv is "Pizza on the Fly", meaning it can and should be able to be done quickly, the construction is straightforward.  Simply set your oven to 350 degrees F.  Get out your stoneware or a baking sheet and lay out your Naan.  Brush your Naan with butter or olive oil.  Top with all of your refrigerator goodies.  Sprinkle on a little salt and pepper and place in the oven for about 10 to 15 minutes (until your cheese is all melty or your pizza just looks sizzling yummy and hot all the way through).  When your pizza is ready to serve, drizzle olive oil across the top (or hollandaise in my case) and enjoy!